Thought I'd Die Laughing

Ever notice how some see things as funny. And others just turn their head and roll their eyes? How, to you, it is so funny that you think you're not going to be able to breathe for laughing so hard? I was about 12 when my best friends uncle died. I had been with her a time or two when she took his supper to him. He as old. I think he was the oldest man I had ever seen. He was all time needing a shave, and his long johns were dirty. I didn't like it much going to his little shack out behind her house. It seemed cruel for him to be there all alone. But he was and this was a totally different world I was living in now. I had just moved to this little town the year before. Didn't know anybody but was sure I'd make friends, I always did when we moved. And we moved a lot. I had make a good friend with Gayle. She was a tom boy like me. We loved to ride our bikes,and climb trees and she could spit better than any boy I have ever seen!! We had really had some fun times playing in the little town of Fulton. This uncle of Gayle's died one day. I don't know if he just died in his sleep or if he had gone to a hospital or just how it happened. But I remember she called me and ask me if I'd go to the funeral with her. She was going to have to wear a dress and if she was gonna, she wanted me to wear one too! I didn't mind the dress thing, had to wear them to school, but a funeral!! I had never known anyone that had died before, much less gone to a real funeral. I was excited! It was as hot as three kinds of hell the day of the funeral. This was back when there was NO A/C! Didn't miss it back then. The church was almost empty. I guess most of his friends had gone on before him. But their was a man that sat in front of us that had on this starched white shirt.I guess he had sat there long enough to really sweat and stick to the pew, because when he leaned forward the shirt stuck. Like someone was holding on to him. The more he leaned forward the more the shirt would pull away from the pew. It sounded just like it was ripping. Well, I looked at Gayle and she looked at me and we both started to snicker. I knew we were gonna get into some big kind of trouble if we didn't stop,AND NOW! Well, Gayle looked away and I looked at the man with the stuck shirt and started laughing harder. The harder I laughed the harder I tried not to. My shoulders were shaking. My face was red, my eyes had tears steaming down from them. One little old lady next to me patted my hand and said in a very soft kindly voice,"Now, now dear, it's going to be alright." SHE thought I was crying!! I laughed harder. By this time Gayle was shaking and holding her nose as not to breathe. We both closed our eyes and put the hankies our mothers had given us earlier, to our faces. We both shook...with laughter. Now the whole church was watching us. Later we learned,everyone was thinking, how sad those darlin' little girls were, over the loss of this dear old man that hardly any body remembered. I'm not sure if we ever told anybody that we weren't crying. It was nice to be thought of as grieving little girls. We'd had our butts torn up if our parents ever found out the truth!!